Wednesday, January 31, 2007

STRANGE BUT TRUE

I was reading this article earlier today and I thought that this deserved a blog.

I read this story and wonder a few things.

1. how much of assholes is his parents.
2. How either disfigured or socially inept is he.
3. What woman would do this for only $130.

10 days with some dude who cant get a girlfriend and all I get is asshole parents and probably groped.

Maybe for $1000. But hey I have standards.

I mean what kind of parent pressures their child so bad that he has to resort to renting a woman for 10 days. His excuse to why he does not have a girl is he is studying to hard.

So his parents would rather he not study so he can be fucking around with woman and waste their money while at college.

See when I was in college I was pressured by my parents to study harder and put the beer, bong and cock down.

So you see maybe I should of been raised in China and he should of been raised by my parents in NY.

peace

Saturday, January 27, 2007

BITCH SANDWICH

Quick post because this is on the down low. I am working today and it is sucky.

Why?

Well there is a bitch sitting infront of me and a bitch sitting behind me. I am in a bitch sandwich. If you saw these ladies you would feel my pain.

8 hours is going to be long.

Help me!

Monday, January 22, 2007

Woo Hoo!

I like many watched the football yesterday. Well I read the paper this morning. Fuck it whatever.

Well I read that the Bears beat New Orleans. Good for the Bears Bad for New Orleans.

I also that New England lost to Indianapolis.

Good if you have a team that is not represented by a state. Then get out of the NFL. First New England Patriots next Mid Western Red Necks.

What also kills me is who are the Patriots that they get like half of the east coast. Bull shit.

Well this is something that has always bothered me I have no clue why but fuck it does.

Also Go Bears and please, please, please.......

BRING BACK THE SUPER BOWL SHUFFLE!

I need to be entertained like that again. I have not shuffled since the Super Bowl Shuffle.

I want to shuffle again.

WO SAID LIFE AFTER 30 IS FUN!

Just to let you know this is a graphic post so there you have been warned.

I was sitting on my couch the other night when all of a sudden I got this pain. Was not a pain that woul make me cry but a pain that I could not figure out why it was happening.

I was sitting there a pain came to me via the side of my right foot.

It fucking hurt.

So I figured ok maybe some shoes I wore.

Well I let it go. I went to my mothers today and asked her. "Do you ever get a pain in the side of your foot?"

She said yes where she has a bunion.

So when I went home I googled Bunion!

Yadda yadda yadda.....

I think I have a "bunionette"

That is a bunion that is not near the big toe but near the little toe.

Fuck this!

I want to be 21 again no worries no bunions.

I have a bunion at 31 at 61 I am doomed.

The main cause of bunions is improper foot wear> What woman has ever wore proper foot wear.

doomed I am doomed

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

I ONLY WANT ICE IN MY VODKA

As many of you in this country are aware it is winter. Well for some of us here in Upstate New York we hate it a lot today. Why you ask? Well I will tell you.

There is a 3 inch coating of ice over everything. I mean everything. Trees are all folded over from the weight of the ice. That means trees are breaking off and falling in the road or knocking down power lines.

So I was rudely woken today by a neighbor to tell me that the power was off. Well I was sleeping do you think I really care if there is no power. Well when I woke up later in the day it was fucking freezing in my house.

So I try to find somewhere to go to get warm. When I get to PM's house he had power and so I take a shower and hop on the computer to see when power might come back on.

Well considering that I live in a county in New York that was hit the "hardest" my power will not be back on until 1/18/07 at around 9pm.

What the fuck is that shit.

Power goes off Monday and they can't get it back on until Thursday night. That fucking sucks.

See with no power means no heat. No heat means that I will freeze to death.

I can stay at PM's house but I am not sure I want to. Maybe I will rent a room at a shitty motel.

I know one thing that having no power for almost 4 days is bullshit. Don't they know that it is January. That means it is fucking cold out. Come on National Grid get those trucks out there.

I was driving around trying to find a place that had power so I could gas up my car. I did not see 1 National Grid truck anywhere.

What kind of shit is that!

The cable company was out in full force fixing their lines. Thanks Time Warner but with out fucking power I will not be able to watch TV.

So I want to say to National Grid.....don't you know that American Idol starts Tuesday night. I mean come on. Get that shit working!!

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Friday, January 12, 2007

ENOUGHT ALREADY!!! WHAT THE FUCK?

I do not know about anyone else but I am real fucking sick of all this shit that is going on between Donald Trump/Rosie O'Donnell/Barbara Walters.

Shut the hell up already!

If you have been hiding under a rock for the last 3 weeks good for you. But to bring you up to speed Rosie ran her mouth about Trump. Trump ran his mouth about Rosie. It was, now this is sad, National news. Then some how Barbara Walters got involved somehow. Still have no idea how the fuck that happened.

The last straw with me was that I saw a political cartoon about it in today's New York Post.

A FUCKING POLITICAL CARTOON. How is stupid Rosie O'Donnell political fuel for a cartoon. I mean come on. There is much more "political" shit going on in this country.

I have come to a conclusion that the media is primarily to blame for this shit getting way out of hand. If they, by they I mean every talk show in history....except Oprah, did not talk about it and make it in to such a big thing. Maybe it would have just gone away. But no those fuck tards at EXTRA EXTRA had to run the story continuously for 2 weeks.

I make a promise the next time I am watching CNN or whatever and that shit is on instead of the fair discussion of how 20,000 EXTRA EXTRA men and women are getting deployed to the Middle East. I swear I will smash my TV screen with a hammer. Then with a shard of that glass from the broken screen I will get in the car drive to that dude who hosts it and shank him.

Mark Mcgrath...yeah that dude from that shitty band ...Sugar Ray.... is now doing shitty television. I mean come on how is he a qualified news man.....well considering it is not REAL news then whatever.

So go away Rosie O'Connell go away Donald Trump go away Barbara Walters and fucking go away Mark Mcgrath.

later

Monday, January 08, 2007

AMBITION...WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR?

I have recently come to the conclusion that ambition is highly over rated. I, for almost all of my 31 years have had a problem with ambition, that meaning that I have none. Well At least I was happy.

Well figuring that I am getting a little older I decided to try and become more ambitious. So I set out to find a new job. Very big goal for me. Well I was successful. I found a job in the field that I actually went to college for.

See after college I was lost. I mean that by I had no clue what to do and just puttered around from job to job for a while. Then I landed right at a job (my last job) that I was there for 9 years. I like the job and all but It was really just a place that I ended up.

Money was good hours were good. So why leave right?

Well ambition flew up my ass and made me leave a job I was at for so long.

I hate my new job. I forgot how ignorant people really are in the world. Let me explain, my last job I worked in an office most of the time by my self. A bit lonely but I got real used to it.

I actually loved it. No one bothered you, I could wear anything I wanted, no casual Fridays. Etc.

Well the new job it is completely opposite from what I had before. I know, I know change is good. But the new job hours are long and tedious, pay is not as good and they have casual Fridays.

I have always hated casual Fridays I am not really sure why, maybe just the term but I fucking hate it.

Any ways in short I left a job that I loved-liked-despised-sorta for a job I despise.

I get that fact that ambition is good but I should be reigned in. Too much of something is not always a good thing. especially since I had zero ambition for so many years.

I am sure that I could go back to my old job. But I do not want to be a quitter.

See again I try to do something positive for myself and I fuck my self over. I should not be left alone.

ERRRRRRR

ps. sorry for lack of post lately starting a new job sucks!

Thursday, January 04, 2007

WHY?

Why do drivers stare right at me when they blow the yield sign down the street, cutting me off?

Why does my mother always want beer out of a tall glass when she only fills it up half way?

Why when you get some money saved something always happens that cost almost that amount?

Why when you eat Chinese food you get so full but are hungry like 1/2 hour later?

Why are men so complicated even when they are not supposed to be?

Why does the cat puke on your bed right after you changed the sheets?

Why does the President Ford Memorial look like a car dealership?


These are just a few questions I am looking for answers to lately.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

2007?

Fuck Resolutions I seem to never keep to them any way.

Fuck resolutions because it makes me figure that I am a serious procrastinator.

Fuck resolutions why take away things that I like only to replace them with things I don't like. Because if I did like them I would have been doing them all along.

I do want to accomplish a few things this year. That is watch more TV, drink more beer, and not try to quit smoking.

Those are all things that I can totally accomplish.